Life has never been a bed of roses for anyone, not even for royalties. The moment we’re born, we’re subjected to vast varieties of needs and wants in this exceptionally perplexing world of ours. The first-ever time we cry is at birth and that’s exactly where the frustration begins, hence it should not be considered unlucky. Being inevitable, frustration should be accepted as a casual part of life.
Let me explain the concept with some easy examples of frustration. Say, a girl with a beautiful voice, suffering from throat cancer, is unable to participate in her college’s annual function, despite trying her best. Her helplessness will lead to immense frustration. In another instance, a man couldn’t marry his university flame because he was unemployed. The inability to reach his goal led him into depression and frustration.
To explain the difference between primary and secondary frustration, let’s take another example: a lemonade business introduces blueberry lemonade during the summers. On the very first day, the local government begins a noisy construction of a flyover just a few metres away from that shop so customers aren’t able to reach, leaving the business in loss. Primary frustration here would be bearing the noise. Secondary frustration would be experienced due to the losses incurred.
Besides these, more types of frustrations are internal frustration, external frustration, pressure frustration and sexual frustration. Anyone angry with themselves or their reactions is said to be internally frustrated. Anything else causing you resentment falls under external frustration. For example, if you’re getting late for an appointment due to traffic. Pressure frustration arises when you’re overburdened with responsibilities or work and you’re unable to complete your tasks on time. This is also known as work frustration. Lastly, when one’s sexual needs are not fulfilled, one tends to suffer from sexual frustration. Even if you lose your emotional connection with your partner, it’s called sexual frustration. If your loved one is causing you irritation over minor things, you can call yourself sexually frustrated.
Conflicts, environmental factors, and personal inefficiencies are the basic causes of frustration and anger. If a mother wants her children to attend the best university but the high expenditure is barring, she will suffer from conflict frustration. Environmental factors can become obstacles in achieving our goals, leaving us sad and bewildered. If you’ve been planning a vacation for months and you miss your flight due to rain, wouldn’t you lose your mind?! Personal inefficiency is another element of anger. For example, if a child with polio lost a race against a healthy child in their school sports, he/she would certainly feel bad about themselves and most likely slip into acute depression.
Other triggers of frustration include stress, family problems, financial issues, substratum disorders like alcoholism or drug addiction, attention deficit, OCD, ODD, Bipolar disorder, IED, grief, and long-term illnesses like paraplegia.
So what are the symptoms of frustration? Mood swings, aggressive behaviour, getting irritated over petty things, giving up easily, feeling anxious, losing self-confidence, losing interest in things quickly, insomnia, negative self-talk, desires to drink and do drugs, eating lesser than usual, self-harm like scratching yourself with a knife, having recurrent nightmares, desire for suicide or killing others, etc.
Frustration can adversely affect our cardiac health and can double the risk of a heart attack. Bottling your anger for months or even more is one of the causes of cardiac diseases. Thwarting also increases your chances of having a stroke because anger can cause clotting and/or bleeding inside the brain. People with a history of Aneurysm hold six times higher risks of rupturing.
Another negative effect of frustration is the weakening of your immune system. Your anxiety levels can shoot up so you can start suffering from an anxiety disorder. People having anger outbursts (especially men) can get severely depressed. People with high hostility rankings are also prone to pulmonary diseases. With your whole body suffering due to your anger issue, your overall lifespan will shorten as well.
It takes years to build healthy relationships, whether they’re with family, friends, colleagues, teachers, students, at the hospital, with shopkeepers, partners for extracurricular activities or just about anywhere for anything. Mood swings last only for a few minutes, hours or days, but that’s enough to ruin any relationship, especially if it’s a formal one. All your efforts go down the drain due to recklessness. Suffice to say, nothing will remain normal in your life if you don’t curb your frustration.
Frustration levels are the measures of frustration one is suffering from. Low, moderate and high frequencies indicate the level of frustration to doctors who then prescribe treatments accordingly. Once diagnosed, you will then need to learn frustration management, that is, how to get rid of frustration or how to deal with frustration. Instead of damaging your personality, adopt the following natural tips:
- Talk to anybody you’re comfortable with and share all that you feel.
- Start writing a diary and pour all your experiences into it.
- Set your routine by making a simple schedule.
- Try Aromatherapy because fragrances like Lavender and Rose are known to relax your mind, body and soul and stimulate you psychologically.
- Adopt a pet if your house is accommodative enough.
- Analyse the situation. We often misunderstand things and react negatively immediately. Instead, take a deep breath and go over the whole situation again. You’ll certainly find a solution if you sit back and think. Taking advice from family and friends is always helpful.
- Start eating healthy foods to get your health back on track. You can keep a “cheat day” once every fortnight to eat junk food. Citrus fruits and berries are known antidepressants.
- Set achievable goals. Always aim for things according to your abilities. Reduce or change your goals if you realise that they are too high for you.
- Make sure you’re sleeping at least 8 hours every day.
- Go for substitutes if your original aim is unattainable, opt for an alternative. Never give up!
- Start exercising because it produces endorphins that will make you feel accomplished and relieve all your stress. Yoga and meditation are also highly recommended.
- Take on a responsibility like making lunch daily or picking your children up from school. Keep yourself busy!
- Brush away all negative thoughts immediately so that they don’t grow on you. Think of all the happy moments of your life as often as you can.
- Do something new or unique at least once a week so that your mind remains fresh. Try a new hobby, sport or go for a vacation.
Despite all your self-care efforts, if you still feel that you’re unable to get rid of frustration or that you’re not reaping the desired results, you can opt for professional help. Go for counselling, visit a psychologist or, if things are getting out of hand, consult a psychiatrist at the nearest medical facility. These are the best ways of dealing with this menace.
